To blog or not to blog, that is the question I've been trying to answer lately. You see, I've started at least six posts but I always seem to hit a wall; I consider myself a word whore yet I can't find the right ones to express myself here. Before my computer crashed a few years ago I would sit down at my keyboard and just type, the subject didn't matter. It was cathartic that act of simply allowing my thoughts to exit my brain via my fingertips. I never thought about what I was typing or what people would think about it. The posts I have started have been, for the most part, angry rants and I didn't want this blog to be known as The Angry Dyke.
The fact is, I am angry, no I am pissed the fuck off! The last 3 years (computer-less years) have been blissfully ignorant; I've gotten all my news from the major networks and the occasional cable outlet. With those newscasts I learned more than I ever wanted to know about Anna-Nicole Smith and Paris Hilton except why they were/are breaking news. Both became famous because a shit-load of people saw them naked and evidently that is way more important than a naked detainee handcuffed, lying on a wet floor in Abu Ghraib, with an interrogator shoving things up his ass. No, the American people do not need to see the video of an American soldier in uniform sodomizing a female detainee; we need to see Paris fucking her boyfriend!
The following is a conversation I had with my father after the torture scandal at Abu Ghraib broke:
Dad: I don't get what the big deal is, don't you think they would do worse things to our people if given the chance?
Me: But Dad, we are supposed to be Americans; therefore we should hold ourselves to higher standards.
Dad: Those sand-niggers are chopping off the heads of our people on video and all we did was make them put underwear on their heads and take a few pictures of it!
Me: The Geneva Convention, which we helped to create, prohibits torture of any kind.
Dad: Being forced to wear underwear on their heads is not torture.
Me: Humiliation and degradation are against The Geneva Convention and it doesn't matter what they do, if we stoop to that level we are no better than they are.
I wonder if Dad would have made those same arguments if the network news had truly covered the atrocities committed instead of giving us the watered-down version.
Being back online has made me realize just how apathetic I had become and I'd much rather be perceived as an angry dyke than an apathetic bulshitta.